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- To wear one of those ninja throwing star guantlets. You know, the ones with rows of throwing stars on them. And I don't mean for fun, I want a legitimate, real, solid reason to be wearing it. One such reason would be if I was a ninja. (see Thoughts)
- Pee off the seven summits. For those who don't know the seven summits are the tallest peaks on each of the seven continents including mountains like Everest. It is a big feat in the hiking world to climb to the top of every single one. That isn't enough for me, I want to climb to the top and then proceed to pee off of it. I may have to rig up some kind of heated tubing system so I don't get frostbite, but I think I can manage.
- Become a world renowned expert in something. I want to be the goto guy for something. Known everywhere as the expert in my chosen field. However, it has to be something TOTALLY useless. Like be the expert on the mating habits of an obscure species of fish, or of the geological behavior of a certain type of rock under extreme pressure. I should have a book published that about 5 people buy copies of. Preferably, I will wake up on my deathbed realizing that I have wasted my life. That would be cool.
- Be a ninja. Do I really need to say more? - Bet three stacks of high society. For those of you who don't know, a stack of high society is 10,000 dollars in poker or betting chips. It is a gambling term. I want to bet three of them; that is 30,000 dollars. On one hand of something, could be blackjack, could be craps, could be poker, could be roulette. It is hard to tell at this point.
- Revolutionize black comedy.
-Sell or purchase something on the black market.
-Bend something to my will. It can be no less than a person. Preferrably a city, country, or the universe.
- Order someone dead by sundown.
- Order someone to "put the whole team on it." This could be for the above goal.
- Have an older, guide figure who gets me out of scrapes. Preferrably he would have some gaping physical defect that is part of his name. Ex: Nine-Fingered Willy
- Get into scrapes, or shinanagins.
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